Bi And Large

OK so yeah this whole back to school thing has been more energy and planning and paperwork than my own damn wedding, I swear! Sorry to have been so AWOL.

The upside: Amy LOVES kindergarten! She has a great teacher and is in a fantastic school district. She takes the bus every day. It stops 2 houses down and she rides with a few neighbors she knows. Our pastor's daughter is in her class. She loves the playground, she loves what she is learning, she loves her backpack, she really loves that she can buy her own lunch every day. Lunch here, astoundingly, is only $2.30, and I couldn't make her lunch in a brown bag for that, so she buys it using an account we put money into and a PIN#. She picks some food from the cafeteria, enters her PIN, and there ya go. She loves all the independence. Every day I go out front to meet her as she comes off the bus, and I say, How was your day? And she always jumps and yells, "Grrrrrrreat!" She's really happy and that's good. She's also learning a lot. The paperwork was overwhelming to get it all filled out and done, but it's done now and she should be good!

Iris and preschool? Not so much. She's in the same preschool that Amy just graduated from, and we know it's a safe, good school. Her teacher is new to us though, and she seems a little sketch. And Iris hates, hates, hates it. She has terrible nightmares all the time. The fear of school has totally upset her. Tuesday she was only there for a couple hours and when I picked her up, she was not only hysterical, she had lost her voice from screaming the entire time I was gone. Thursday I called up and organized to stay in class with her. When I told her I would be with her all day, thinking that would help ease her back into it, she still cried so hard she was gagging herself at the idea of going to school. So we didn't even make it on Thursday. She has stopped sleeping. Last night she was up past 2am and finally crashed out face down at the top of the stairs. It's just really messing with her. It has been a couple weeks and it is getting much worse, not any better. Normally I would pull her out and say OK, not worth the trauma, let's wait and try again next year. But I NEED a job and that means Iris NEEDS to be in school. So I have no idea what to do now.

On the job front: zippo. I apply for at least 5 - 6 jobs every day, more if I can find them and have the time to do the research on the company and write cover letters in between school pickups and cleaning etc. I have had a few interviews. Nothing. I'm frustrated because we need the money so badly.

Main news recently: My mom went through major surgery on Monday. She has been in a wheelchair because the bones in her feet are dissolving as a complication of having very long term diabetes. The breakdown of bone is what caused an infection in 2004 and gave her sepsis and organ failure and put her in the hospital for so long. She has no infections now, but her feet (especially her left foot) is very badly deformed and she cannot walk on it. And it hurts. SO this cool surgery they are doing makes her bionic: They reformed the foot, fused a bunch of bones to make them stronger, and totally removed others and replaced them with steel, and anchored the whole thing up her leg and ankle. It ended up being a much more complicated and difficult surgery than expected, and took all day. She has been in a LOT of pain and it has been really difficult for all of us, especially dad and Kysa who are there bearing the brunt of it. It has brought back so many horrible memories for all of us with her unconscious and hurting in the hospital. Beyond that recovery has been difficult with blood sugar problems and oxygen level problems and a suspected PE (what killed Sam.) BUT it sounds like yesterday (Thursday) she kind of turned a corner with recovery and with pain control. She was able to come off her IV and able to stand up briefly, and last night they actually discharged her. So she's home now recovering with lots of percocet. She has one of those frankenstein cage braces on her leg, with the pins and screws coming out, and she will have that and be in the wheelchair still at least 3 months. Hopefully, when all that healing is done, she will have a foot she can walk on for short distances again and be pain free. We'll see!

Thanks for checking in on me. Sorry to have been so off and on. It has been the most crazy summer / autumn. I'm so exhausted!