Bi And Large

I am SO proud of my church today.

I mean, I have always been proud of them, for so many reasons. Mainly because of their common sense and intelligence and thoughtfulness with theology and social justice. Hot button issues that tend to drive other Christian denominations to emotional fervor, even fundamentalism? In the ELCA - that is my church, the Evangelical Lutheran Church in America, one of the largest denominations in the US - those issues are handled with respect, thoughtfulness, prayer, delicacy, and wisdom. Never with wild abandon and impulse. Never with actions that just result in hurting others. I admire this so greatly, I can't tell you.

Let me give you an example. Abortion: total emotional hot button for most churches out here. Drives many people from some churches with guilt and splits other churches with arguments and cries over SIN and MURDER! In the ELCA? A simple statement, and a plan. The statement is that abortion is usually best avoided, but there are times when it is the best choice that can be made, and any woman or family facing such a difficult decision needs the support of the church like no other time in their life. We should run to embrace them and hold them and love and support them, regardless of the outcome, because anyone facing an unintended pregnancy is in a hell of a place. The plan? Sex education, first and foremost. Lots of it. Contraception. Broader adoption laws. Encourage adoption and foster care within our church community. Work hard to make our world a place where women have equal economic power and always fight tirelessly against rape, incest, and domestic violence. Now see? That makes SENSE. No standing on street corners yelling at people. No blaming the already crushed. It just works. That's what I love.

So. One other thing I have always liked about our church is their more liberal stance on LGBT relationships. They have always welcomed gay and lesbian members to the church with welcome arms. The letter from the bishop, I believe, greets LGBT members "as Children created by God, in His image." I love that. When we joined the church in 2004, some churches were allowing gay and lesbian pastors to serve... but ONLY if they were celibate. OK. So that's a step farther than many Christian churches, and that's good, but it doesn't make any logical sense. Either you welcome and accept LGBT folks, or you don't. No sitting on the fence. Which is it? The church recognized this dichotomy too, but has moved slowly to address it, for fear of a schism in the denomination. It has been discussed to death and this week was the big assembly to finally vote on whether or not ELCA churches could perform gay marriages and have partnered gay pastors.

In my work, I meet many retired ELCA pastors and older Lutherans. I am always pleasantly surprised at how many of these white, farm-bred midwestern seniors are vocally supportive of gay and lesbian brothers and sisters in the church. Some basically leave it with a "Well it's not like what they do in the bedroom affects ME any" attitude. I had one pastor explain in great detail to me the thought process behind this decision for the ELCA, and the rebuttal to those from other denominations who argue that the Bible says homosexuality is a sin. (First of all, yes it is mentioned in the Bible, but not as often as other sins. So while we will discuss it, let's not give it more power than we ought - it's not the ONE thing salvation is determined on, and not the major dealbreaker mentioned in the Bible or anything. Second, while we believe the Bible is the inspired Word of God, we also believe that the men who transcribed the Bible were humans, and were thus by definition fallible. It is quite possible that very strong cultural prejudices of the time could have influenced their writing. Third, if we're going to take every command in the Bible literally, we should take them all. The Bible also says don't touch lizards, or eat goat meat, or have period sex, and never ever touch a dead rabbit. Why is it OK to reject these commandments as holdovers from an earlier age of humanity, but not this one about sexuality now that we know more about how hardwired it is?) I also had one retired pastor just say offhand, and it was such a telling statement; that over the years he had seen many, many men and women come to him in tears and anguish, telling him that they were struggling with these desires and didn't know what to do. That right there told him it was something in the way people were made, they couldn't change it and didn't want it, it just was, and if they were created that way then it is as much a part of the human experience as anything else.

Anyway, the assembly. Pete got to go, at least to part of it when he wasn't bogged down at work. (He works for the ELCA and the assembly was here in town.) He says things were handled marvelously with humor and respect overall. Sure there were some odd ducks, every group has them. But it was run very smoothly by the people in charge. The big event was that at one point during the assembly, randomly - VERY randomly - we had some severe weather pop up and a tornado hit the convention center where this was all taking place. No injuries, the roof was just damaged a bit. But you know it was only a matter of hours before the extremists started calling it a 'sign from God' and claiming it for their side. As I read in one article, "I wonder if they note that the tornado hit before we started even discussing sexuality; and once we took the vote and it passed, suddenly the black rainy weather broke and beautiful warm sun burst out. You can make an argument for the weather being on your side go any way you like!"

The end results? Everything passed. :) Celebrating gay marriages passed by 61% and ordaining partnered gay ministers passed by 55%. Tornadoes be damned. I am sure there will be a bit of an aftermath, there always is with something this important with a denomination this size. But it is my sincere hope and prayer that the church will remain whole and healthy, stronger than ever, blessed by this decision taken in prayer and thoughtfulness. I know I am beaming from inside out with pride and joy today. Once again, my church did the right thing. They restored my faith in God and in people really listening to God and doing His work instead of their own here on earth. I am humbled.

I read an incredible rundown of the issue / vote on a blog by Matt Algren. He quoted a pastor in his blog that I simply must quote as well, because it's too good not to.

"In testimony before the vote on Resolution Three/Step Two, Rev. Lee M. Miller, II of St. John’s Evangelical Lutheran in Philadelphia stepped to the microphone and had this to say:

'I stand in favor of this resolution because I stand on the shoulders of gay and straight folks who have proclaimed the gospel of Christ and a message of love.

I am not saved because I’m a heterosexual. I’m saved because of what God has done.

And I want to say to those who are listening that they are not condemned because of their sexuality; but they are saved because of how God loves them, that God’s grace is for all, in all.

Thank you.'

This is the message of the Christian Church. That we’ve gotten so far away from it is disheartening, but I’m so proud of my Lutheran sisters and brothers for their courageous move back in the direction of the message. One day we will be of one mind on this issue. Until then, we all will continue to work."

It has been a very hectic week with my parents here - fun, but crazy with work and kids and trying to buy furniture and appliances and everything else in between. So I am keeping this short for now!

If you want to see my dad (and the girls!) showing off the same condo, the link is http://s743.photobucket.com/albums/xx74/MNcondo/?action=v...

School starts in a little over 2 weeks. I am going insane trying to get everything ready!!

Karma is a funny thing.

It's also one of the oddities of personality that the people who can be the most hurtful are often also some of the kindest and sweetest people you'll ever meet. And in the case of my grandparents (my mom's parents) this is absolutely true. I don't make any excuses for some of the things said or done to me as a child - but at the same time I look at the lives they lived towards others and I know they were very generous, loving people. Especially towards children. They had a real gift especially for welcoming in foster kids or anyone else who just might need someone right then. They had a way of making kids who felt scared or upset feel at ease and secure. They spent their whole lives as long as I knew them lending a helping hand to all kinds of families that they just happened to cross paths with who needed a little boost: the disabled, the displaced, the unemployed, the immigrants, the invisible. Never just some cash and a pat on the back, they formed friendships, taught skills, cooked together, talked and laughed, helped others navigate the world. They did a lot of good for a lot of people.

I have a cousin on that side of the family, the youngest son of their youngest son, who was born with a very rare immune disorder. He spent almost his entire life at Children's Hospital, and died when he was 8 years old. During that time my grandparents of course spent a lot of time at Children's, and found they enjoyed it. After my cousin passed on, they didn't stop going. They stayed on as volunteers becoming 'grandparents' to all of the other long term severely ill children there, especially those who had little or no family to be with them. In some cases, families would use all the money they had to send their children to this hospital for treatment, and there was no money for anyone else to travel with them so they were alone. In some cases, families found it too difficult to be with their children as they died. In some cases, family didn't exist. In some cases, families just didn't care. So my entire childhood, this is what my grandparents did, they spent all their time at the hospital, forming great relationships with the terminally ill kids and helping their families down that end of life road. They read books and brought treats and sat by beds and just generally were grandma and papa.

So one year, they met a little girl named Misty. Misty was born with several severe disabilities, including spina bifida, and her mother abandoned her. She was put into the system, but that poor girl never once found a decent foster home. It was just one crummy, abusive or neglectful home after another. Not only did she have physical disabilities to overcome but she had no one to encourage her, teach her, love her, cuddle her, or even be a stable parent as she shuffled from one home to another. But it never stopped her. The state paid for her surgeries so she was always at Children's and the nurses there and my grandparents became her stability. They knew her situation and took a special interest in her and they were far more stable than any home she was briefly in, and they all loved her. My grandpa especially was really taken with her and they were fast friends. After she got out of surgery when no foster parent showed up, he'd be sitting by her bed waiting for her to wake up. They read and played and she got stronger and more able with every surgery over the years. Once when she ran away from a particularly scary home, my grandparents helped keep her safe and contact her social worker and get her into a better spot. When she turned 18, grandpa cosigned on her first car loan for her. The nurses too. One nurse helped set her up in a little apartment when she was old enough, and another helped Misty through college. Impressed by the nurses who had cared for her for so many years, Misty got her nursing degree and became a LVN and got a great job at the VA hospital. This little kid that was just so much rubbish to someone, that people thought would just be useless, turned out to be smart and able and wonderful because people cared about her. I know my grandparents were SO proud of her and all that she had become.

Well now my grandparents are at the end of their lives. They are in their late 80's / early 90's, and their health is slipping away. They haven't been able to volunteer at the hospital in some years. My grandfather's Parkinson's is really bad now, and he gets forgetful and confused. A couple weeks ago he had to go in for some surgery to repair a hernia. It all went well, especially considering his age! So he gets out of surgery, and who do you think his nurse was, sitting by his bed waiting for him to wake up? It was Misty. All these years later and the little 'throw-away' girl he had adored and encouraged and had seen through to adulthood was working at the same VA hospital where he had his surgery and happened to be his nurse this time.

Life is funny.

It's been a weird summer around here. Very dry, very cool. No rain - we've been like a foot behind in precipitation. And temps barely making it out of the 70's when normally we're in the 100's. Combined which means no severe weather, no thunderstorms, no hail, no tornadoes. I guess the no tornado thing is good, but I have sorely missed the thunderstorms. It isn't summer without them, and I love them. Actually I love the severe weather too, the warnings and watches, the blobs of red and purple moving across a map, the panicked newscasters breaking into TV programming, the greygreen sky churning and moving so fast.

So last night we were all hard at work trying to keep up with the 18gazillion chores we have to do this weekend when the sirens went off. First time this year, and it's almost the end of summer! We didn't get anything more than some heavy rain and didn't think twice about it. And this morning, here is today's news clip:

http://www.wcco.com/video/?id=64923@wcco.dayport.com

The liquor store that was decimated is about 7 miles from our house and the street they have a reporter on with all the downed trees is about 3 miles from our place.

Phew!